Overcoming shyness to converse confidently

One of our postpandemic challenges has been to mitigate the onslaught of social media and online meetings. Yes, we have mastered how to communicate behind the laptop or smartphone through emails, instant messaging, and (last resort) phone calls. But the challenge is now face-to-face communication. Speaking spontaneously with others has become so difficult that people resort to checking their phones mindlessly to avoid speaking with others when faced with a new social situation.

Whether it is to expand your network or build rapport with clients, here are three tips to help us communicate confidently with others, especially our colleagues or customers:

Manage your anxiety

Speaking spontaneously with unfamiliar people creates anxiety. We worry about being judged and we end up staying quiet. Acknowledge the anxiety. Prepare a few conversation starters, like a brief response to common questions like “What do you do?” Maintain a confident posture, smile, and breathe deeply before you engage with others. Be yourself and act naturally.

Use positive words and open body language

Using positive and uplifting words is a good way to build rapport. Complimenting the person genuinely for looking good, having a nice smile, liking their attire and other positive words can help put the other person at ease. Adopting welcoming body language, such as maintaining eye contact and open posture, encourages openness in return. Avoid crossing your arms or looking away, as these can convey disinterest.

Get to know your audience by being genuinely interested in them

Ask questions to help get to know the other person better to find common ground, such as “What do you do?” or “Where are you from?” Listen carefully to what the other person is saying so you can respond well. Do not be too busy thinking of what you will say next. When you listen, your response will be more spontaneous.

Small talk and building rapport can be mastered by overcoming your initial anxiety. Be in the present, enjoy the moment, listen carefully, and respond positively.

Maricel Badilla will facilitate an eight-hour training workshop titled “Conversing with Colleagues and Customers Confidently” on Nov. 12 in Makati City. The course can help you or members of your team with business communication skills.

For more information, you may write to [email protected] or send an SMS to 09193428667 and 09989641731.

For your other learning needs, Inquirer Academy could assist you in designing and facilitating live workshops, a webinar, or a self-paced online course for your organization.

The author is the executive director of Inquirer Academy.