Screen time

Classes are starting again online for the second straight year,” says G. “We are middle class but my husband was laid off last year. We started a small buy-and-sell business. Money is tight. But our son, [who is] in Grade 2, wants the best gadgets and Wi-Fi for school. Should we get them for him? We quarrel with him because he is in front of the screen all the time, even at night. But it’s impossible to live today without computers. What can we do?”

My reply: Technology of course aids in online learning, but children do not need the latest gadgets or fastest Wi-Fi to do well in school, and you know it. Grade 2 students mostly only have two hours of class time daily, with breaks in between. Almost all schools provide printed modules or USBs with documents, which can be delivered or picked up by those without any internet access.

In 2013, therapists Maribel Sison-Dionisio and Michele Alignay, Ateneo parent Nerisa Fernandez and I surveyed the digital behaviors of more than 4,000 high school students and researched extensively on the neurological, pediatric, social, cognitive effects of indiscriminate gadget use, resulting in our book “Growing Up Wired.”

No one foresaw the pandemic but what we discussed then still holds even more today, since as you said, screens have become ubiquitous.

Instead of repeating what we said in the book, let me update from recent sources. Before the pandemic, most affluent tech workers in Silicon Valley, who create the devices that trouble us now, delay and limit screen time for their own children, mindful of the dangers of attention deficits, addiction and other learning issues.

Ironically, in the United States, it appears that it is the wealthy and educated who fear the dangers of screens, rather than those in lower socioeconomic classes.

“It could happen that the children of poorer and middle-class parents will be raised by screens, while the children of Silicon Valley’s elite will be going back to wooden toys and the luxury of human interaction,” says The New York Times.

“Lower-income teenagers spend an average of eight hours and seven minutes a day using screens for entertainment, while their higher-income peers spend five hours and 42 minutes, according to research by Common Sense Media,” the report adds.

Your son is on screen for far longer and you know that school is not the reason. A video of a Filipino student caught playing games during college class went viral months ago. Guide your son to self-regulate now while he is still young and hopefully not yet addicted to gadgets. Our book includes practical strategies done by Filipino families.

According to psychologist Richard Freed, limiting screen time helps with attention and behavior issues. Moreover, he “worries especially about how the psychologists who work for tech companies make the tools phenomenally addictive, as many are well-versed in the field of persuasive design (or how to influence human behavior through the screen). Examples: YouTube next video autoplays; the slot machine-like pleasure of refreshing Instagram for likes; Snapchat streaks.”

Former editor of Wired Magazine Chris Anderson, who heads a robotics company, also tells The New York Times: “We thought we could control it. And this is beyond our power to control. This is going straight to the pleasure centers of the developing brain. This is beyond our capacity as regular parents to understand.”

Prioritize screen time for the essentials: for live classes, online tests, video chats. Do assignments offline to minimize distractions and to give space for deep learning.

For your family business, Zoom meetings require you to be online but many other tasks can be done offline. Take breaks in between meetings to alleviate Zoom fatigue. Schedule nonscreen activities with your son: walk around the neighborhood, dance to music, cook dinner, read print books, play board games—and strengthen your bonds as a family.

Get “Growing Up Wired” at Lazada or Shopee.

Queena N. Lee-Chua is with the Board of Directors of Ateneo’s Family Business Center. Get her print book “All in the Family Business” via Lazada, or the e-book on Amazon, Google Play, Apple iBooks. Contact the author at [email protected].