The anxious generation

(Third of four parts)

In his eye-opening book “The Anxious Generation,” US social psychologist Jonathan Haidt presents graphs and data galore to argue that the rise of smartphones and social media was a direct cause of the explosion in mental health problems in teens and preteens starting from the 2010s.

Parents bear a huge responsibility in this regard. Haidt calls on parents to “delay your children’s full entry into the phone-based childhood by delaying when you give them their first smartphone (or any “smart” device).”

The pediatrics chair of a prominent hospital told me as early as 2015 that she was shocked by the number of parents who proudly announce that they give their infants a smartphone soon after birth.

READ: Social media causes poor mental health

“These babies cannot even hold their heads up, and their eyes are already glued to the screen,” said the pediatrician. “In my waiting room, the silence is unnatural. Imagine a room full of quiet babies who are staring at the tablets held by the yaya. I reprimand the parents, but some got offended and went to other lenient doctors.”

Early screen exposure is linked to disorders, attention and socialization deficits, because the human brain takes a long time to mature (at age 25 or so). Ideally, childhood is shaped by free play.

“Once they enter a child’s life, they push out or reduce all other forms of nonphone-based experience, which is the kind that [our] experience-expectant brains most need,” says Haidt.

Parents often argue that children need phones in case of emergency, such as sudden typhoons, dismissal changes, etc. In the past, we did not bring phones to campus, and during emergencies, we hunkered down in school and waited—literally—for the storm to pass. We had anxious moments, to be sure, but we survived them.

But fine—parents today tend to be more anxious and protective, often contributing to their children’s anxiety as well. A good compromise is to give children a basic phone in elementary and middle school.

READ: Can Asian community culture protect against social media harm?

“Coordinate with other parents so that your children do not feel that they are the only ones without smartphones in school,” says Haidt.

During webinars, I call on the parent heads to take the lead. “Be brave enough to do what you know is right for your children,” I say. Afterwards, many tell me privately that it is hard because “there are always parents who want to show off their kids’ and their own latest phone models.”

When I urge the administration to help, they inundate me with stories of parents getting mad when rules are instituted to curb phone use. When schools desperately rely on tuition, it takes bravery to do the right thing.

Rather than screen dependence, Haidt urges parents to increase their children’s engagement with the real world. Urge them to do part-time jobs. Stow away phones at dinnertime to encourage face-to-face conversation. Send them to technology-free camps.

In the mid-2010s, I wrote about a group of Ateneo de Manila senior high school boys who spearheaded a gadget-free weekend camp. All gadgets were given to parents at the start of the out-of-town trip. Initially, some boys worried about what to do, but the class officers (with the help of enlightened parents) initiated raise-the-flag games, swimming, trekking, star-gazing. When Mass was celebrated on the final morning, with the glorious sunrise as backdrop, many boys swore that it was the most fun they ever had.

Back to schools. “Most schools say they ban phones, but that typically means only that students must not use their phones during class,” says Haidt. “This is an ineffective policy because it incentivizes students to hide their phone use during class and increase their phone use after class, which makes it harder for them to form friendships with the kids around them.

“A better policy is to go phone-free for the entire school day. When students arrive, they should put their phones into a dedicated phone locker or into a lockable phone pouch.” INQ

(Next week: What government and business can do)

Queena N. Lee-Chua is with the board of directors of Ateneo’s Family Business Center. Get her book “All in the Family Business” at Lazada or Shopee, or the ebook at Amazon, Google Play, Apple iBooks. Contact the author at [email protected].