A female reader in her 30s asks: I am applying at a well-known family business. I have a standard resumé for all prospective employers, but should I add anything else to make my resumé stand out?
My Reply
Research on the family business you are applying for. What are its strengths and challenges? How can you best help the company grow?
Reflect on the position you want and tailor your resumé to that end. Are you applying for a marketing post? Then highlight your previous marketing experiences, and give concrete details on how you managed to not just meet, but also exceeded the expectations.
If you are angling for a human resources position, give instances where you successfully handled recruitment, training and labor issues.
Family businesses look for team players who would fit into the culture. Cite instances where you have played mediator or motivator, or where you fixed potential problems rather than adding fuel to the fire.
In what ways have you communicated well with your past employers and colleagues? How have you handled conflict?
If you have previously worked for a family business, use numbers to strengthen your case. How much costs have you defrayed for the business? How much have you contributed to earnings?
If you have never worked for a family business, reassure your potential employers by giving actual experiences that showcased your ability to adapt to novel situations.
Mindfulness
The same reader asks: Mindfulness is a buzzword these days. It sounds New Age-y. How can it seriously be practiced at work?
My reply
There is nothing mystical about mindfulness. It simply means being aware of the present moment, of what we are doing—and feeling—at a certain time.
Instead of worrying about the past (which cannot be changed) or the future (which may never come to pass), we are called to be mindful, accepting ourselves now and savoring what the present has to offer.
In a meeting, observe if you are distracted or focused. Why does your attention wander? Resolve to give colleagues your full attention the next time, and observe what happens. Do they respond more positively?
Reflect on what you feel at work. Are you annoyed by a co-worker who keeps on chatting on the phone? Why do you react in that way?
Then make a deliberate effort to not be affected by trivial situations. Perhaps your co-worker talks on the phone because she is worried about her kids at home. You can cut her some slack, or you can talk to her politely to keep her voice down out of courtesy to everyone else.
Manage conflict
Mindfulness can help manage conflict. The next time you argue with your boss, try your best to stand in her shoes.
For example, even if your proposal is innovative, perhaps it is too costly for a family business that is struggling to survive in a competitive marketplace. Can you blame your boss for shooting down your proposal?
You are mad because your colleague is not doing his fair share. Instead of seething silently, putting you at risk for suddenly blowing things out of proportion, try to understand where he is coming from.
Perhaps he has low self-esteem, and truly believes you do a better job than he does. Or he has been a procrastinator since grade school, and believes cramming is the way to go. You can reach a compromise and work out a joint approach that works for you both.
“Too often ‘toxicity’ poses as ‘standard operating procedure,’” says Michael Carroll in “Mindful Magazine” (August 2015). “Nourishing trust, candor, openness, respect, and a range of other healthy human values can be a simple matter of noticing workplace health and affiliating with it.”
Queena N. Lee-Chua is on the board of directors of the Ateneo de Manila’s Family
Business Development Center. Get her book “Successful Family Businesses” at the University Press (e-mail msanagustin@ateneo.edu). E-mail the author at
blessbook.chua@gmail.com.