CMMA and family

Even if family members are hurting, away from each other, in pain, “the family is the Good News of God,” said Luis Antonio Cardinal Tagle, Archbishop of Manila and honorary chair of the Catholic Mass Media Awards (CMMA) during the 37th CMMA Awards Night at the Star Theater last Nov. 4.

Last January, Pope Francis had stressed the integral role of the family during his visit and drawing upon this directive, the CMMA Foundation had chosen the theme “Communicating the Family: A Privileged Place of Encounter with the Gift of Love” for this year’s celebrations. Cardinal Tagle described the stressors afflicting Filipino families, both within (addiction, lack of communication, kids raised not by parents but by other relatives) and without (corruption, war, dislocation). Despite all these, Cardinal Tagle was firm in his conviction: Each family is in itself the Good News.

Labor of love

This column began before the papal visit or the cardinal’s injunction, but whether consciously or not, it was born of the same spirit. Family businesses remain the most prevalent form of enterprise in the country, accounting for anywhere from 80 to 95 percent of businesses, depending on which statistics you believe. Whether we like it or not, according to Cardinal Tagle, we are all born into our respective families, and to this, I add—those who are not founders are also born into their respective family businesses, with their share of triumph and pain.

The pain is clear, as attested by your numerous letters, asking for advice on sibling rivalry, parental favoritism, lack of fairness, in-law conflict, squabbles over money, mismatch of values within and across generations. The list is endless, for family conflict is as old as creation, when Cain killed Abel in the very first case of sibling rivalry.

But these are the ties that bind, and since the family is the Good News, we can never lose hope. To curious readers:  No, it was not my idea to do this column, but Inquirer president Sandy Prieto-Romualdez’s. After my dissertation on the psychological dynamics of successful family businesses in 1995, I started helping families, but since I wanted to focus on math and education (still my main goal today), I asked these families to be discreet.

In 2013, Sandy urged me to finally write about family businesses. So many needed help, she said, and since I was already in the helping profession, I would be reaching a bigger audience (aside from students). When I met the wise and gentle editor Raul Marcelo and touched base with the highly effective Tina Arceo-Dumlao and Princess Daisy Ominga, my hesitation was allayed considerably.

I had feared two things: One, I would run out of issues to discuss; and two, I would run out of sources, for family businesses are notoriously private. Both fears turned out to be unfounded.

Readers, thank you for embracing the column, and e-mailing constantly. I do not Tweet, Viber, or Facebook; whatever accounts supposedly in my name are not mine. Because of your messages, the column has expanded beyond what I had envisioned: I had to reimagine and research on the role of retired grandparents (Oct. 23, 2015), and next week, we will meet husband-and-wife doctors who despair because no child is interested in continuing their clinical practice.

While I cannot address your issue personally or immediately, I promise to eventually read all e-mails. To those clamoring for a book of columns, Inquirer will come out with it next year.

My favorite messages are those bearing good news: Referrals of families with inspiring practices and good values, those who have overcome adversity to create lasting businesses, those who if needed, prioritize family over profit. We need more of the good news: Keep these letters coming.

Best practices

As for privacy, while it is true that many family businesses remain reluctant to speak on the record, they become more open when I promise to change small details (industries, locations, ages) that have no bearing on a particular issue. I also never touch on finances. I am a psychologist, not a lawyer, banker, stockbroker or financial analyst. Thank you to these sources for their trust.

But my biggest thanks go to the families that generously and willingly share—many of them for the first time in public—the vision, the character, the practices that make them successful. It is always a pleasure writing about them. They are proof that family businesses can be ultimately fulfilling.

Thank you, CMMA, for deeming this the “Best Business Column” of the year.

Queena N. Lee-Chua is on the Board of Directors of Ateneo de Manila University’s Family Business Development Center.  Get her book “Successful Family Businesses” at the University Press (email [email protected].)  Email the author at [email protected].