AS 2014 ended, I suffered one big loss in my life. My longtime friend and cardiologist — Doc Ernie Santos, as we fondly call him – finally succumbed to pancreatic cancer after battling the dreaded disease for over a year.
Ernie was truly a man for others. He was what we call in law as “res ipsa loquitur” – the man spoke for himself. But rather than write stories about him, I thought it better to give you a glimpse of the man through what he has written and what other people who know him up close and personal say about him.
On family and friends
“Pancreatic cancer has the highest mortality rate of all the major cancer types. Ninety-four to ninety-five percent of us will die within five years of diagnosis. Only 5-6 percent will survive more than five years. Seventy-four to seventy-five percent of us will die within the first year of diagnosis. Those are terrible odds.
“I felt that I had lost my life even before I had actually lost it. But then there was you. God sent me all of you. A village of support, concern, love and prayers started to form around me. You talked to me, prayed with me, prayed for me, messaged me – you all somehow, in your own little ways – loved me back to life.
You gave me the strength to fight back. You gave me the resolve to beat the terrible odds. You showed me what friendship and family was all about. You reminded me that God was with me and would always be.”
Indeed, our common friend, Regis Puno, described Ernie as a friend in these words: “Like many of you … a part of me died when Ernie left us. Although he is my best friend, I realize Ernie is the best friend of many, many people. That’s because he makes you feel you are the only thing that truly matters to him, and he will go the extra mile for each and every one of his patients, family and friends. He was overflowing with his generosity, medical prowess, talent, genuine care and other admirable qualities which he unselfishly shared with us.”
On the Big C being irrelevant and immaterial
“Nothing has really changed. The uncertainty of life is the same for all of us. You could cross the street and get hit by a bus. Others may be dancing on a ballroom floor or playing golf in the middle of a wonderful day and drop dead because of a heart attack or stroke. Our brothers and sisters in Tacloban were just sleeping in their homes and were swept up into heaven (referring to Supertyphoon Haiyan/Yolanda in 2013). I have a small window of an idea of perhaps how and when I might go – but even with that, I could still get hit by a bus, instead. We don’t know. We’ve never really known for sure at any point in our lives. That’s the way it’s always been – since we were born. And so, realizing that, I have lost my fear of the uncertainty of life, nor the certainty of death.”
On complete surrender to the Supreme Judge
“Of course we will all together storm the gates of Heaven with prayers and a petition for the miracle of healing — that God takes away the cancer cells, banishes them forever, never to return; that I may be a living testament to His awesome power and compassion. But will that be His will? Will He answer our prayers in the way we want or expect Him to? We don’t know. It’s His will, not ours. And I would be a hypocrite if I said. “I surrender to Your will only if it coincides with mine.” I must surrender no matter what the answer may be. And I do. And the fact that I do brings me such an unexplainable inner peace that I can stand here in front of you all and say – I am alright, I will be alright. No matter what happens – if I go or if I stay, I am good, I will be fine.”
On moving forward
for the country
Ernie’s brother, Doc Ed, described Ernie as “the leader of the clan… who loved life and filled the world with love” and a “blessing to all of us”. Ed shared with us Ernie’s concern for the country: “In a country plagued by the cancer of poverty and discontent, fractured by the divisive immobility of partisan politics disguised as a righteous attempt to look back at who should be held liable for the past, if not for the present, the accident of losing our footing and missing a step into the future is waiting in the dark corners of history. Perhaps it is time to untangle ourselves from the gridlock of blame. Too many people are starving. Inequality and unemployment grow. There is too much crime. Many are losing hope. Millions are desperately reaching out. Let’s do this now, before an accident happens. For which we will have no one to blame, except perhaps ourselves.”
Time is gold
Doc Ed also shared with me another set of Ernie’s words of wisdom: “Every tick of the clock is actually a moment of your life fleeting away. So hold on to the time that you have. Love life well. Appreciate those who really matter. And tell them you love them now, before time runs out.” These were not empty words. In fact, his son Paolo, now a lawyer, shared with us this story that demonstrated how he showed his love for the poor: “During his Baclaran days, on the night of his birthday, he arrived at the parking lot of the church and this huge group of people surrounded his car. It was the church’s parking attendants with their families and the moment he stepped out they all sang him a happy birthday. He got so surprised and asked us what he did to deserve something like that. Again, due to my kuripot nature, I said “eh paano ba naman hindi. Eh kung mamigay ka ng tip sa kanila maliit na ang 500 pesos. Why do you give them so much?” He said that it is because he admires the poor who strive to earn income through legitimate means and that by giving them huge amounts is his way of showing that it is possible to survive through legitimate means and that there is no need to turn to drugs and crime to get through.”
Fill the world with love
His wife, Vikki, summed up Ernie as follows: “Ernie was a very warm, loving person who genuinely cared for people and who had a soft spot for the poor. All he ever wanted to do was to make people happy and to ‘fill the world with love his whole life through.’”
So that was Ernie to me and to many others. To you my friend, Ernie, I say you have left a mark on all of us. We can only hope that we can approximate your life. Pray that we do. ’Til we meet again.
The author is a senior partner of the Angara Abello Concepcion Regala & Cruz Law Offices (Accralaw) and the president of the Shareholders’ Association of the Philippines (SharePHIL). The views in this column are exclusively his, and should not be attributed in any way to the institutions with which he is currently affiliated. He may be contacted through francis.ed.lim@gmail.com.