Help! Victimized by family–Part 1

From a reader who calls himself Thomas:  My late mother transferred all her real estate assets  (including the family corporation) and farm (under her maiden name, not part of the family corporation) to us, her six children, as gifts prior to her death more than 10 years ago.

Since three of us are living abroad, she entrusted the management of her gifts to my sister and her lawyer husband who are living locally. They were tasked to run the corporation and the farm, respectively.

I am the youngest in the family and was not involved in the family business.  I looked up to and trusted my sister and her husband, who are top in their careers.  That is until 2011, when I visited the country and did my own troubleshooting as a series of unorthodox and uncharacteristic business practices had taken place, jeopardizing the assets and farm proceeds, costing us millions of pesos.

Under my brother-in-law’s management of the farm, we lost millions from a portion of the farm (several hectares) that was expropriated by the government. The broker ran away with the funds.  But he and my sister are full of excuses.  They did not do anything.  They did not go after or attempt to have the culprit prosecuted despite our pleas. Questionable, right? What infuriates me is despite discovering the shady scheme, not one of them has taken responsibility.  There were definitely anomalies.

The same thing happened with the real estate assets. Rental proceeds were misappropriated, with no accounting or transactions until my visit here, when I was instrumental in helping liquidate some properties.  (I was already back abroad when the actual negotiations and sale took place.)

We siblings living abroad had no idea of what was taking place. We were not informed nor updated.  Instead, I was stonewalled.  The siblings here claimed I had agitated them, so they stopped communicating.  They were not transparent in the finances. My share was much less than I thought I would get. A big chunk of the proceeds went missing.

I am divorced, homeless and unemployed.  I have misfortunes, unlike my well-to-do siblings who are retired and have spouses whose family corporations are much bigger than ours.  I intend to have them audited for all lost funds due me because of their negligence and dishonesty.  I just want my fair share.  What steps do I need to take?

Answer: I am sorry to hear about your problem, but sadly, it is all too common.  It is natural to trust siblings, especially those who seem to be successful in their field, but when things are not put down clearly in writing, conflict often happens.

For instance, if your mother had clarified things in her will (even a holographic will), then your family estate management would have run so much more smoothly.

I do not blame you for being extremely angry and for wanting to get what you believe is your fair share.  However, take a deep breath and try to think rationally.  You call it a “shady scheme” that your sister and her husband did not prosecute the thieving broker.  You say they are “full of excuses.”

While I am inclined to agree with you, perhaps you need to understand that in the Philippines, justice grinds exceedingly slow.  (Even high-profile criminal cases remain unresolved to this day.)  What you call “shady” your relatives might merely have viewed as pragmatic—they “did nothing” because they probably felt it would not be worth the energy and the expense.   Or they simply did not know what to do.

Your brother-in-law is a lawyer, but you need a corporate or even a criminal lawyer who specializes in cases of theft.  Get a second opinion, and weigh the pros and cons of prosecuting the broker.

Frankly, the robbery happened so many years ago.  If ever you catch the thief (which I highly doubt), she would already have spent what she had stolen from you.  Even if she did jail time, you would more than likely never recover the stolen money.  Having said that, any form of punishment would prevent the broker from victimizing other people.  I agree with you that inaction is not the best thing here.

Your life is not smooth now, so it is also natural to cast blame on other people, such as your sister and her husband.  Now, I could very likely be wrong, but I don’t want you to assume that they are automatically out to deceive you.  Before this incident, did they ever trick you?  Did they ever do things to make you suspect that they would ever cheat you of anything?

Since you used to look up to both of them, then I wager the answer would be: never, till now.

(To be continued)

Queena N. Lee-Chua is on the Board of Directors of Ateneo de Manila University’s Family Business Development Center.  Get her book “Successful Family Businesses” at the University Press (e-mail [email protected].)  Email the author at blessbook.chua@gmail. com.