Rejoinder on ‘happy thoughts, big dreams’
Last week, we talked about how constantly feeding our minds with positive thoughts and emotions like love, joy, compassion, gratitude, hopefulness, optimism and a caring and sharing attitude can favorably impact one’s life and improve physical, emotional and even financial health.
Conversely, harboring negative thoughts and feelings such as resentment, envy, selfishness, ingratitude, anger, jealousy and revenge can make one’s health and whole life miserable.
“Maintaining happy thoughts and big dreams is easier said than done. Doesn’t one with a positive mental attitude ever get bothered and sad when things go wrong?” Roland Chavez of Alabang commented via e-mail.
Positive outlook
No one ever said that maintaining a positive outlook in life is going to be a walk in the park. It requires a constant and conscious effort on one’s part to be always on the lookout for these negative thoughts and emotions, and to shut them out before they could creep in. And when they manage to occupy one’s mind and emotions for a while, he/she should immediately recognize them, accept that he/she thinks and feels them, and then release them.
A patient of mine, who is an executive in one of the top corporations in the country, does it so well. Whenever she catches herself having these negative emotions, she tells herself something like this: “I accept feeling resentment towards a colleague who has hurt my feelings. I feel bad because of it—I could feel my blood pressure rising, my heart beating fast and my stomach getting upset. I now release these negative feelings and sensations, forgive my colleague and sincerely wish him well despite what he has done to me.”
She repeats these affirmations a few times, and her ill feelings are converted into a positive energy to sort out whatever differences she may have with her colleague. What’s amazing is that she has used this technique effectively to abort her migraine, her irritable bowel syndrome and even attacks of allergic rhinitis.
Positive mental state
Just as a good habit can be formed with constant repetition of an act, a positive mental state can be obtained with constant control of one’s thoughts so that only positive thoughts and emotions are retained.
One may consider it as a skill that can be learned. It may take some time to learn and master it, but once this skill is acquired it can pay handsome dividends in terms of good health, happiness, peace of mind and success.
It doesn’t follow, though, that things will always go the way one wants them to happen. Positively minded people are also subject to challenges and problems which can set them back for a while; they may also experience stress and anxiety when confronted with a serious problem. But they’re in a much better position to spring back from these setbacks than those who constantly harbor negative thoughts, and feel negative emotions.
Recovery
Last week, we mentioned about Aling Remy, one of the victims of Supertyphoon “Yolanda” whose cheerfulness, hopefulness and optimism despite everything that happened to them make one confident that she and her family would be able to recover from the misfortune that beset them.
In contrast, many Yolanda victims we’ve met have remained stuck to the tragedy, playing over and over in their heads the scenes when the typhoon struck, indulging in utmost self-pity and even getting angry at people who are trying to help them just because the assistance didn’t come sooner as they expected. These people will have to undergo some intensive psychological rehabilitation before they can even recover physically.
I hope former senator Ping Lacson, as rehabilitation czar, consider positively resetting the typhoon victims’ minds, including those of some city officials, as one of the “must-dos” in his rebuilding programs. This can significantly accelerate the rebuilding process. Continuing to nurture feelings of resentment, hopelessness and complaining that the government and others are not helping enough can only draw more misfortunes and a weakened initiative to actively take part in the rebuilding process.
Mental positivity
I’ve also recommended a similar mental-positivity program for people who are struggling with any form of addiction or compulsion. I’ve always believed that these people have predominantly negative thoughts and emotions, causing them to unwittingly inflict harm on themselves and others.
One who smokes, drinks excessively, use prohibitive drugs, and those who find pleasure in lighting killer firecrackers during New Year’s Eve may have strong negative thoughts and emotions deeply embedded in their subconscious minds, causing them to indulge in self-destructive practices. A thorough mental reprogramming may be necessary to weed out these mental viruses that have corrupted their mental programming, and convert their tendency to inflict harm on themselves to positive health-seeking behaviors.
It’s true that the process of mental and emotional reprogramming may be easier said than done, but one thing for sure—and I’ve seen a lot of people do it—is that it can be done. And I’ve seen these people transform their lives, and the lives of others, into much better ones.
So if you want a change in your life for health and whatever reasons, try a mental and emotional change first. It’s a choice you make, a simple decision you have to commit to. But it could be a life-changing one.
